Forefront Families

Babyhood is the time for development of self-awareness. They become aware of noses, eyes, hands and toes, and appear to recognize happy and sad faces.  They not only learn to recognize family members, but as they become more secure in themselves, they learn to accept strangers.  Awareness of surroundings brings with it a fear of loud noises such as the vacuum cleaner, power tools, thunder, sudden bangs, and dogs barking.  One-year-olds have no concept of where these noises originate.  Fear is a built in defense mechanism.  Fear and pain are nature’s way of protecting us from harm.  Parents need to teach kids what to be afraid of.  A one-year-old child will not understand an explanation of where the loud noise came from.  The best way to deal with this fear is to remove the noise where possible.  Vacuum when the child is not around.  Let the child play with the vacuum cleaner while it is off.  You can slowly introduce the noise by being a long way from it and slowly walking the child closer to it.  It is never safe to use power tools anywhere near children.  So, always tell a child that noise is dangerous.  Dogs move suddenly and bark loudly.  Dogs are playful and boisterous and can bite or knock children over.  If it is the family dog, then the child is going to have to learn to live with it.  Introduce the dog slowly.  Do not let the dog jump up on the child.  Show the child how to pet the dog gently.  Large dogs are often naturally very gentle with children but, until you are confident, supervise their interaction.  If the dog does not belong to you, but you know the dog and child will meet, perhaps pictures of the dog and talking about the dog will help.  The introduction needs to ensure there is a space kept between dog and child until you are sure the child can handle the situation without fear.  It is important that a child learns to be cautious around animals.

Toddlers can become afraid of the noise of the toilet flushing or the bath draining.  They are not able to work out that they are too big to actually be sucked down, even though their fear may stem from their foot or hand being pulled down with the water.  It is important not to flush the toilet while the child is sitting on it or pull the plug while the child is in the bath.  They will get used to the noise of the water disappearing without actually seeing it or feeling it going.  If they are already afraid of the bath, it will usually be because of a bad experience.  It is important never to leave a child in the bath alone.  They can fall easily, may hit their head, and can drown in as little as 2 inches of water.  If a small child is afraid of the bath, wash him in the sink or wide pan.  Then sit him in the bath and let the water run slowly into it.  If a child is afraid of the toilet, don’t make a big deal of it.  Let him continue to use the training pot until he can sit on the toilet seat without fear.

When a child is old enough to understand, it is important to acknowledge the child’s fear and talk about it.  Until that time, parents have to be the eyes and ears to protect their children from fear and anxiety in their lives.