Overcoming Obstacles and Dealing With Failure
'Man is most uniquely human when he turns obstacles into opportunities.'
—ERIC HOFFER
'Failure is only the opportunity to more intelligently begin again.'
—HENRY FORD
'Failure is not falling down, it is refusing to get up.'
—ANONYMOUS 

Failure is part of life.  The idea that failure is to be avoided at all costs, that no one should have to experience failure is destructive.  Face it. People “fail.” The destructiveness comes from failure being viewed with fear and shame.  It is important for kids to be taught the skills to cope with failure as a natural part of life.

We need to show our children how to accept undesired outcomes graciously, and to rise above failure with dignity. Encourage your children to strive to do their best, and to have high expectations. This doesn’t mean that the child will win.  It doesn't mean the child has to be the best – just to do their best.

The human spirit is very resilient and can overcome many obstacles. IT IS OK TO FAIL. There is life beyond failure! It won’t kill you unless you have not been shown that failure is part of life, and that it is acceptable to fail.
Some defeats are only installments to victory. (Jacob Riis)

So how do we teach our children to handle failure?

1.Acknowledge that failure is a possibility.
2.During times of failure, put the failure into context for your children.
For example:
  • Someone else at the time performed better, and that’s okay.
  • Individual expectations do not match those of the onlooker, and it’s okay for us to have different expectations.
  • One may not have been taught the necessary skills to achieve what was sought.
    • 3.Show your kids how to  lose graciously.
    4.Acknowledge the child’s disappointment and comfort him / her.
    5.Expect that your child does his best, not necessarily be the best.
    6.Celebrate the positive aspects of the process, like growth, experience and fun.
    7.Work out what could improve  performance for the next time.
    8.Set smaller, achievable goals along the way rather than limiting “success” only to one far-reaching goal.
    9.

    Watch and guide the competitive attitude of a child.
     
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